With the Wind and the Rain in Your Hair

This is not really a secret, but I'm not exactly awesome at math. I envy those who can churn out numbers mentally. And this is not a new realization. However, I was loosely reminded of my weakness when I was showering this morning. I was trying to calculate how many bottles of shampoo and conditioner I must have purchased in my life (welcome to the thoughts in my head -- you're in for a bumpy ride). Not surprisingly, I couldn't settle on a number, but I did decide that it must have been a pretty substantial number (I love my hair products).

The reason for this musing is not as unfounded as it may seem. Here was my line of thought: Despite my having purchased numerous bottles of shampoo and conditioner in my life, I still have not perfected the art of the purchase. That is, when I run out of conditioner, I have a full bottle of shampoo, and when I run out of shampoo, I have a full bottle of conditioner.

This quandary is not unique to my hair-washing regimen (lather, rinse, repeat, massage into scalp, wait 60 seconds, rinse). When I have a full jar of peanut butter, my jelly is on its way out; when I am out of bagels, I still have a tub of cream cheese. And I can never seem to get these items perfectly aligned (if you have mastered this art, do not hesitate to enlighten me).

And while you might be thinking, Get over it, it's just shampoo, walk over to CVS and buy another bottle, I'm here to inform you that it is so much more than that. For some reason, I never notice when I do have a good amount of shampoo and conditioner. Say, when the conditioner is full and the shampoo is half empty. At that point, it's still a pleasurable hair-washing experience. So how come I only notice when one is over?

Ironically, in life, a presence is only made obvious at the brink of an absence. Appreciating an abundance, be it time, love, opportunity, or the plethora of other things in our lives, is foreign to us. Only when you are standing there slamming the bottle onto your hand to force out what little conditioner remains, when you are in no position to make an immediate CVS run, do you realize how much you really do love that conditioner.

The truth is, life is anything but equally full bottles of shampoo and conditioner. Some days the shampoo is in the lead, and others, the conditioner is making a break for it. It's just something we have to be okay with. Shampoo and conditioner, you win. I'm throwing in the (hair) towel.